September Blessing 2

Another blessing I experience from God was leading worship for lifegroup (cell group).That day Grace asked me if I want to lead worship for the Friday night. I was reluctant because I don't know what to do...  but then I agreed with condition I pick the songs and do worship and someone else lead. One of the coach was originally suppose to lead the worship session with opening prayers too while I do closing one. However, unexpected circumstances occur that the coach couldn't make it and pass to one of the leader whom I am close too. But because I was not fully prepared so I ask the leader to do most of the leading while I do the worshipping.

Well my first leading was not that really good in my opinion, I play the song using iTunes in laptop. It was kind of rush because we have to follow the rhythm of the music. I feel like everyone doesn't get into the mood of worshipping which doesn't really aligned with my achievements or expectation.

So then I was encouraged to lead the next one next week which I accepted and this time I plan the songs with the achievement I pray to God I want to fulfill and happen during the worship. My yearning and achievements are 1. to bring the old lifegroup worship night 2. coming back to heart of worship where we just worship God wholeheartedly and God in the midst among us showered His presence and love. I miss the old lifegroup where the worship plus reflection time was really long because people have the freedom to express their worship to God without limit. I also miss the presence of heart of worship where we just praise God and worship God by praying to people, share verses, singing and other things to rejoice God and bless other people.

The song I pick for my 2nd try leading the worship was 1. Heart of Worship 2. Man of Sorrows 3. How Great is Our God. For the past few days I pray to God to give confidence to lead and let nothing distract me leading it and praising God. I just want it a session even though short special for God as we put ourselves in front of God. I started writing what I would speak and even find a verse for that day. A verse that God put in my mind is "Do not be anxious about anything, but in every situation, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God" Philiphians 4: 6

I target to people who are worried with assignments due next week or worried about the future because one of my cell group friend is leaving Melbourne. 

Ah ~ I forgot to mention someone from Germany came to lifegroup and she was half german half Indonesian. I was happy to meet someone from Indonesia and can speak Indo. It make communication easier and I make a new friend too~.

Friday came and I am prepare to do my 2nd try of leading worship. I open up the session with game just to relax ourselves with laughter and have fun. For me it's really fun and interesting idea as people enjoyed it and God's presence move with something new idea from me. It was fun to do something different once in a while.

Afterwards, I open the worship with my speech. Strangely I didn't read my speech and just said what I remember. I just talk and open up according how God want me to say as His messenger. I share a verse I found and I ask Ruth to read in German version just because God put that idea in my head. I mention that the song are old song and welcome anyone sing with their own language which at that time I refer it to Ruth.

Then yeah... we sing the first song and I close my eyes to feel the songs and God's presence in our gathering. I sing every verse of the song wholeheartedly as like I was praying to God and for my friends too as an encouragement and reminder.  I don't know how much God interfere in their lives while worshipping but I know that God is touching each one of their hearts. I know He is working as we worship Him. We close up in very emotional deep song of "How great is our God". The song itself remind how Great, Splendid and Majesty is our God in any circumstances beyond our measures, understanding and comprehend. I can feel the union of everyone singing to God and the presence of God because the forces was so amazing that I sing in Indonesia and Ruth sing in German too. It is just so amazing that moment that I can't describe it well but experience it and know well in my heart God is here with us. 

After singing, I open up a speech for reflection time which the person is free to do whatever they want to worship God like singing, reading bible and praying. It was suppose to be 15 minutes but then I realize that it was 45 minutes and I was too busy singing I didn't realize it was late already. However, the coach didn't want to stop yet as he was still reflecting on God. By the time coach finish it was already 9 pm. We were suppose to discuss our topic "God unified" and give examples how to unified and support the church... but even before he started talking the topic, he asked for prayers for his sister with cancer and the verse i share early on the opening worship touch his heart so much that he kept repeating it and it's a reminder to him for his circumstances. I didn't feel surprised or happy back then. But after the lifegroup finish I reflect the Friday night I realize and it make me happy and surprised of how God flow in that moment and can use me of sharing that verse, which I originally aim for students, to remind my coach of the tough situation his face and even the songs I pick God use it to remind him. How amazing God's flow and creativity! He really is a master of surprise and comforts. It is so amazing experience leading worship when God control everything and we just follow Him whatever He told us to do and not worrying anything else except all eyes and minds on Lord Jesus.


For the rest of the hour that we suppose to use for discussing our topic, we used it to pray for his sister and his family. This shows us unity, support and love from each of us which is God's plan of making us learn our topic about what is unity and how God unites the church.

I was really happy about my 2nd leading worship as I feel it was different and God really did amazing works during that day and how He move freely among us and use each one of us. I feel proud that I can be use to bless and serve other people by God and it encourage me to bless people in everything I got + God's presence and ownership.

God really teach me a lot of things through this experience and opportunity that I never had once before. If Grace didn't offer me and everyone didn't support me I wouldn't have this opportunity of serving and without God's help and plan I wouldn't also experience leading with confidence. Because this is out of my comfort zone but I take a leap of faith. Yes I do make mistake in that day which I sing too loud during reflection time and it make me really sad for few days because I thought i was hindrances, annoying and irritating to them since they never told me except one of the coach who mention it to me when I ask for feedback. The feeling the others were  not honest and doesn't tell me makes me feel like i was in condemnation because just i mention before I also sing the verse as i was praying for them to God. Even though it didn't reach their heart when I do it but I know God hear my intention and share it to them. That criticize make me down and depress but it was only a few days because I feel relief after I apologizing and it didn't bother me again. However it didn't stop me from wanting to lead again next time but it was just i am sensitive person in a way.

So thank you God for your experience while I study in Melbourne. Whatever I learn and the teaching you taught me in Melbourne help me to apply it when I gone back to Indo.